BrentDarling

BrentDarling
Chicago, IL

I've always wanted to be a parent, but I've also always planned on waiting until I was in my late 30s / early 40s before having children because my parents were both 40 when I was born (and it's the age Madonna had kids too). Well, I'm 31 now so that time is getting closer and closer. I'm trying to form stability in my life that I can eventually bring children into. I would ideally like to marry a man who also wants children who we will adopt together, but I'm planning to have children husband or no. It informs my dating choices. I've stopped dating men who are too much older than I am and if a guy specifically says he doesn't want kids it's an automatic deal-breaker for me. I don't want to be in the position of trying to convince a lover that having children is a good thing to do -- I want someone who also feels a calling to be a parent. There's an ad campaign in Chicago called "Foster Kids Are Our Kids," with the line, "Help make foster care better," and whenever I see those ads I feel very drawn to becoming a foster parent. I'm not interested in surrogacy (which is not a moral judgment, it just seems a little creepy to me). However, a gay male fried of mine co-parents with a lesbian couple and it's really beautiful how they all love each other and have worked everything out. I would be open to that kind of co-parenting if there was a female friend I had a really strong bond with. So anyway, I'm glad I found this website on the sidebar of ChicagoPride and thanks for all the resources it provides.