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LGBTQ Parents - Lesbian Moms & Gay Dads

Eight Baby and Kid Sleep Tricks Your Doctor Will Never Tell You

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Face it. Doctors are pretty lame with practical advice on stuff that should come naturally to babies. So here are a few tricks we’ve picked – none risky, we promise – that might help you get your baby to sleep or back on track sleep-wise.

1. Dads, take charge. This is one area where dads can really add some value. Sadly, it’s because we have nothing more to add than just being odd and different though. Send dad in to do the final diapering and reading and baby won’t get distracted by the thought of mommy milk or the comforting sensations of the mommy aura. This goes also, unfortunately, for midnight diaper changes when you’re weaning the baby off breastfeeding. Babies won’t think “food!” when they see daddy’s breast-less chest and dad has a better chance of getting baby back to sleep.

2. Pump up the volume. Don’t let your child get used to a completely quiet house, or you may be subject to a baby who wakes to every siren or dog bark. Usually, yes, babies sleep through anything, unless they are conditioned to complete silence. If you’re using complete silence as a tactic in the sleep wars, you may be doing more harm than good.

3. Be all business at night. While moms and dads often can’t resist a cuddle with the baby or even trying to get the baby to smile or laugh while changing and feeding, everyone will get back to sleep faster if you are calm and efficient in the semi-dark, getting the baby back in bed with as little distraction as possible. This way, baby knows that daytime is playtime and nighttime is “get back to sleep as soon as possible.”

4. Let the baby fall asleep on his own. Every doctor or sleep specialist will encourage strict routines to help the sleep ritual. What some won’t think of though is making sure you put your baby in bed when he or she is drowsy rather than completely asleep. Falling asleep on your own is an important development step for a baby, which you can help by getting your baby in bed when you sense he is getting drowsy.

5. Treat your baby like he or she has jet lag. Experts recommend that when adjusting to new time zones, you should spend daylight hours in bright sunlight and keep out all light at times you should be sleeping. The same goes for babies. Make sure his or her internal time clock knows it’s nighttime.

6. Turn down the baby monitor. If you’re so sleep-obsessed that you have to check on your baby every few minutes, you’re going to end up teaching the baby that every gurgle or whimper gets mom or dad’s attention. I am definitely not a “let them cry it out” dad, but I do know that giving in to the temptation to just peek in on them usually reset the timer on my efforts to get my kids to sleep.

7. Skip the diaper change? Yes, maybe, if you don’t smell #2 and you think the diaper isn’t really full. A full diaper change, complete with baby wipe hitting warm skin in the night air, will definitely wake up a sleeping baby. Wake up a baby for one last feeding before you go to bed. This might be the one trick that scores you some extra sleep. While it might be risky to wake up a baby for more stimulation, if you can accomplish the feeding to a half asleep baby, it might mean your baby remains full and satisfied all the way until morning. This means you get some much needed baby sleep of your own.

Survey: Videogames Are Not Detrimental to Kids’ Academics

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A new study has shown that videogames have no adverse effects on the academic performance of kids. The research, done by the Michigan State University, reveals that video games do not affect children’svideo games do not affect children’s math skills and may have a positive effect on visual-spatial skills.

The study monitored the academic performance of students from 20 middle schools in Michigan. The researchers compared the usage of online and offline video games that the students played in correlation to their academic performance. It found that the videogames helped the kids learn visually by reacting and thinking in terms of images. The children were able to develop key skills that would come in handy in various fields such as engineering, technology and science.

Parents Perspective
Parents may have encountered the good and bad side of videogames. Many parents who allow their children to play educational videogames from a young age have known their kids to be more responsive to them than while simply watching television. For example, videogames are known to increase children’s reaction times in response to stimuli.

Another advantage for many parents is that videogames can be used to introduce children to computers, thereby giving kids a head start for the future.

On the flipside, there are disadvantages to videogames too. Children who play age-inappropriate games may have a bad experience and react negatively to them. Some studies have also demonstrated that first-person-shooter (FPS) and other similar games may increase childrens’ aggression levels and desensitize them to violence.

Survey: Videogames Are Not Detrimental to Kids’ Academics

By

A new study has shown that videogames have no adverse effects on the academic performance of kids. The research, done by the Michigan State University, reveals that video games do not affect children’s math skills and may have a positive effect on visual-spatial skills.

The study monitored the academic performance of students from 20 middle schools in Michigan. The researchers compared the usage of online and offline video games that the students played in correlation to their academic performance. It found that the videogames helped the kids learn visually by reacting and thinking in terms of images. The children were able to develop key skills that would come in handy in various fields such as engineering, technology and science.

Parents Perspective
Parents may have encountered the good and bad side of videogames. Many parents who allow their children to play educational videogames from a young age have known their kids to be more responsive to them than while simply watching television. For example, videogames are known to increase children’s reaction times in response to stimuli.

Another advantage for many parents is that videogames can be used to introduce children to computers, thereby giving kids a head start for the future.

On the flipside, there are disadvantages to videogames too. Children who play age-inappropriate games may have a bad experience and react negatively to them. Some studies have also demonstrated that first-person-shooter (FPS) and other similar games may increase childrens’ aggression levels and desensitize them to violence.

What Can Dads Learn from Kids

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Here are some funny sayings dads can learn from kids:

1. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing Rugrat underwear and a superman cape.

2. It is strong enough, however, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 by 20 foot room.

3. When you hear the toilet flush and the words “Uh-oh,” it’s already too late.

4. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

5. A six year old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36 year old man says they can only do it in the movies.

6. If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing baseball shoes it does not leak – it explodes.

7. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq foot house 4 inches deep.

8. LEGOS will pass through the digestive tract of a four year old.

9. Super glue is forever.

10. McGyver can teach us many things we don’t want to know.

11. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can’t walk on water.

12. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

13. VCR’s do not eject PB&J sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.

14. Always look in the oven before you turn it on.

15. The fire department in Wayne City has at least a 5 minute response time.

16. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earth worms dizzy.

17. It will however make cats dizzy.

18. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

Smart Ways to Deal with a Dirty Diaper While Out Shopping

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It is a scenario dreaded by most new dads. You are out, maybe enjoying a nice afternoon’s shopping with your baby and your baby chooses just this time to poop. You’ve been lucky up until now and you’ve either avoided the task entirely or only had to make the change in the baby nursery with all the accoutrements around you.
When the baby goes, many a dad will pause for a minute and wonder whether you couldn’t’ just ignore it for a half an hour, or the time to get home. However, pooping a diaper and wetting a diaper are two very different things. If the baby is crying due to a dirty diaper, that screaming will only get louder and more insistent. You need to take action fast. Here are some tips if you’re never been caught with a diaper emergency outside of the house.

  • First of all, never leave the house for more than five minutes without carrying a spare diaper. Babies have an instinct about pooping at the worst times. If you are out and really can’t either buy diapers or get home quickly, you have no choice but to admit you’re a horrible, lousy excuse for a father and find a mom to ask for a spare. She’ll probably smile patronizingly at you and you’ll have to suck it up to get the goods. Dads also have been known to wipe the baby thoroughly with toilet paper and then wipe again with wetted tissue and stuff the baby back into her clothes minus a diaper. This is a recipe for another wet disaster, but can be used in a pinch. Better a wet baby than a dirty baby.
  • Keep an extra changing pad in the car or your bag. Believe me, you do not want to set your baby out on a dirty restroom floor or risk getting poop all over another surface, like your car upholstery or carpet. Baby poop smells and is hard to clean.
  • Locate a place where you can easily do what is required. Large stores often have changing stations equipped for you to do the job. Otherwise, locate a baby section or store where the staff and other shoppers are not likely to raise eyebrows if you settle yourself in their midst to change your baby’s diaper.
  • If you have a stroller, use it to lay your baby in to change the diaper.
  • You can also use the back seat in your car or the back of a station wagon to lay your baby down while you change the diaper.
  • Carry a zip lock bag to store the dirty diaper before you can discard it.

Know the Toddler Phase

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The toddler phase in a child’s life can be sharply marked by an increasing need to assert its independence. This will be a time fraught with challenges for you, as you try to support your toddlers’ impulses to explore his environment, while also safeguarding them from any harm.
If the battle to assert your authority may sometimes lead to frayed nerves or tempers on your part, be sure that you will also be rewarded by the development of a new and complex level of interaction between your child and yourself. The toddler phase can indeed be very demanding, especially at the initial stage of the phase.
Here are some ways in which you can encourage and extend your support during this difficult and yet essential and interesting phase in your child’s life:

  • Let your toddlers explore within a limit: It is the parent’s task to set acceptable limits and as long as your toddlers do not cross those limits, allow complete freedom to explore. Your toddlers will learn to appreciate this and broaden their horizons through the use of their newfound curiosities.
  • Honor and appreciate the choices made by your toddler as long as they do not harm anyone.
  • Be calm and composed: Do not get irritated by your toddler’s tendency to refuse or rebel. This is actually a good sign to tell you that your toddler is developing a mind of his or her own.
  • Do not neglect your toddler’s urge to play: Get your child various types of games appropriate for a toddler’s age. Your toddlers will learn important things in the process of enjoying the games such as eye-hand coordination, an understanding of logical sequences in events etc.

Also read this Useful article for single parents.

How Can You Be Tactful with Unwanted Advice?

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If you are a new dad, you may often receive unsolicited advice on how to bring up your baby. Close friends or family members may typically offer this. Casual acquaintances and even total strangers may add their bit.
While it may be well meaning, a torrent of unwanted advice can be highly annoying. Parents have the first prerogative of making choices and making decisions for their baby. Exasperated parents are not to blame if they see unwanted advice as interference in their freedom to bring up their child the way they want to.
However, it is also important that you respond to such counsel in a way that is not hurtful to the other person. These are different approaches you can adopt when faced with unsolicited advice:

  • Listen before you react: Listen to and consider a suggestion offered to you before rejecting it. Chances are you may actually value it.
  • Find something to agree upon: Even if the advice in its entirety is not acceptable to you, try to see if there is some part of it that you can agree upon, and acknowledge that.
  • Be polite: If you know that your rejecting it will not go down well with the person offering you advice, you could thank the person for the concern and let him know you will consider it. It will keep the peace and you are not bound to put it into practice.
  • Argue wisely: If you must counter unsolicited suggestions, do so logically, backing your arguments with facts.
  • Be frank: If you think it necessary, do not hesitate to let the person know that you do not agree with his or her opinions.

Useful Article: Parenting Advice

Moving is the Best Exercise for Babies

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We know that exercise is important for our health as adults, but did you know that the same philosophy applies to babies? It is recommended that babies should work their muscles at least half-hour each day, although not necessarily all at once. Here are basic exercises that you can do with your baby, to stretch and tone the muscles:
Stretching
With your baby on his tummy, roll a ball in his direction so he has to extend his arms to grasp the ball and then roll it back to you. Alternately, you could sit facing each other with your feet bottoms touching and roll the ball back and forth, stretching in the process.
Standing
If your baby is trying to stand, encourage him by making him want to move towards you. Make sure you do this within the safety of a crib or on well-padded baby bedding. Play with a toy to get his attention and then re-position yourself on the other side of the crib or bed to get him to come to you. You can also make the stretching motion yourself and show him what it looks like when you stand up.
Crawling
Your infant’s attempts to crawl are naturally going to help him exercise his little body since he will work hard to push himself forward with his arms and legs. Motivate him to move by clapping your hands and motioning your child to come towards you. You can also use a noise-making toy to grab his attention.
Jumping
Toddlers require a more advanced activity like jumping to help practice motor skills. You can make a line on your carpet using a folded piece of construction paper and help your baby hop from one side to the other. To add to the excitement, make up rhyming tunes as you go or listen to music.

Dine Out with Your Baby

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Just because you are a parent now does not mean you can’t occasionally dine out without feeling guilty about leaving the baby at home. The problem is that your baby, who may not find the prospect highly exciting, could end up feeling bored or neglected.
A little forethought and planning however can ensure that eating out will be as much fun for you as for your child. Here are some valuable tips to make dining out with your baby a pleasant experience for you:

  • Keep your baby busy: Carry interesting toys or games to keep your baby engrossed in playing while you are at the eatery.
  • Ensure you baby is comfortable and safe: You may carry your baby’s favorite chair to the eatery so your baby feels at home. Alternately, take some time to choose a suitable place in the restaurant—far away from kitchen odors and noise.
  • Be ready for food-spills: Bring in your baby’s towels, diapers, and napkins to take care of those food-spills as soon as they may occur.
  • Order your baby’s favorite food: Your baby needs to be equally attracted by the food on its platter, as you would be with yours.

Dine in a quiet and un-crowded eatery: Crowded restaurants will tend to make your baby restless and cranky.

  • Reserve early and pre-order the food: Avoid long waits to be seated and consider ordering the baby’s food immediately after sitting down.  Most restaurants will have simple pasta and butter and steamed veggie options for babies.   Don’t hesitate to ask.

Teach by Setting Examples

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If you are looking for a great way to make sure your children are off to a healthy start, don’t overlook the importance of a nutritious breakfast.
According to the American Dietetic Association (ADA), when children are consistent about eating breakfast each day, they tend to consume more calories than those that don’t, but they are less likely to be overweight. Furthermore, not eating breakfast may predispose them to diets that fall short of providing enough calcium and fiber.
Another key component for fathers is what behaviors they are modeling. Children are quick to learn by watching others, so it’s important that fathers consider what type of example they are setting through their own eating and activity level.
According to the ADA, research shows that when mothers pressure their young daughters to eat more healthy foods, the children tend to do the opposite. They report that the most effective way to get them to eat more fruits and vegetables is to lead by example.
Children who see their parents frequently eat healthy food are more likely to do so themselves. Being overweight can cause a host of problems, creating difficulties in every area, from finding clothing that fits well to avoiding the school playground.
For young children, it’s especially troubling because they don’t yet have the ability to prepare their own foods or be much of an active participant in deciding what they will eat and how active their family will be.
Parents shouldn’t make their child’s weight a constant worry, but they should take it into consideration and check up on it with their family doctor.

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