Being a parent is a full-time job. Therefore, anyone wanting to be a parent should plan this very carefully and thoroughly. Parenting is a decision you make for life and brings a whole set of responsibilities with it. In order to make the planning stage of your parenting decision a bit easier, we have identified the essential steps involved in same-sex parenting.
1. Be 100% sure that you are emotionally and financially prepared for becoming a parent. Raising a child requires both an emotional and a financial investment. It is an amazing thing to see how this investment pays off in the long run, however, you need to make sure that you are ready, willing and able to do this investment.
2. Always plan ahead. Keep in mind that life can always throw you curve balls. Be it a divorce or separation, bankruptcy, death or any other unforeseeable event. Make sure you have made arrangements ahead of time so that your child does not have to suffer from these painful occurrences.
3. Once you are ready to make this commitment, make sure to cover all the legal grounds of your surrogacy arrangement. The legal framework is the single most important aspect of a surrogacy arrangement. A sound contract with no loopholes is what you need. Make sure you seek legal counseling to understand your rights and make sure your rights as intended parents are well-protected in your legal arrangement.
4. Choice of egg donor is a very important consideration in a surrogacy arrangement. Your egg donor will be the biological mother of your child. Therefore, you need to be able to decide whether you want your child to know the biological mother or not. Your egg donor could be a friend you can trust, or can be completely anonymous where you don’t meet her at all. Both options have their pluses and minuses, therefore, make sure you know exactly what you want and make sure you are comfortable with your choice.
5. If a friend is going to be your egg donor, make sure that all her hormone tests and infectious disease screening has been done. You will want to make sure that your egg donor is a young healthy individual with a good ovulation cycle.
6. Make sure that you and your partner are both screened for infectious diseases. The last thing you want is to pass on an infectious disease to your newborn child.
7. Plan for the future. Keep in mind that IVF treatments are not 100% guaranteed, therefore, there might be the risk of an unsuccessful attempt the first time around. Even though your contract is likely to grant you a number of attempts with your surrogate, having the egg donor go through the same procedure all over could be hard and costly. So if you have a chance, consider embryo freezing for any embryos you are not planning on using in your first IVF attempt.
8. Be ready to embrace the new life you are bringing to this world. If you are at this step, you are already one your way to becoming a great parent.