New and Improved. . .sorta

Okay, so I gave my world, my heart, my almost everything to Her for over a year. . .one day she walks in and tells me she has just exchanged vows and rings with some other girl, who she has been "close to" for two weeks. There was absolutely a crack in my universe. . .I won't go into all the details of our absolutely unique situation. . .but I can say that I was (and partly still am) completely broken. . .and to top it off. . she took the puppy we just got while I was out of town. . .

So, only two or three months before this fateful day, I came to the absolute realization that I was to be a wife (Her wife) and mother (of Her children). . .and then I realized that is just my purpose in life, period. To be a wife and mother. . .and as I watched from the sidelines as the person holding my heart moved up north with it. . I had to make the decision to take this as a defeat and lie down about it. . .or to move forward with my plans to be a mommy. . .I had already made the decision (approximately 2 years ago, before Her) that the next relationship would be the last. . .whether it was for better or for worse. . .

The donor had already been chosen. . .with Her specs of course (even down to the dimples). . . the doctor in town that "gets all the lesbians pregnant" has been called. . .and I had already had an appointment with him and was starting to get my folic acid in check. . .

The final decision (well sorta) was to go forward as a "Single Mother By Choice" and I will be having my second insemination in June. . .the first one didn't take and I blame the stress of the situation at hand on this. . .

I have found an inner strength that I never knew I had. . .I thank Her for this. . .because I am ready to face pregnancy. . .labor and parenthood with my own strength and that of my Creator! I am still healing. . .and debating on exactly how you write to someone that has moved away and politely request your heart back. . .but I know that I am ready to be "Mommy". . .

If you're interested. . .I'll keep you posted!