ProudParenting.com - Foster Care - Comments

I ordered books yesterday!!!

want2bmoms — Sat, 26 Apr 2008 10:08:18 -0700

I ordered books yesterday!!! Not all these (and we will get guess How Much - thanks!!)

But several... Like $50-60 worth!!! I love ABE and Amazon!! YAY!

Guess How Much I Love You by

SarahM — Fri, 25 Apr 2008 06:06:11 -0700

Guess How Much I Love You by Sam McBratney

haha

mommyzrus917 — Sat, 19 Apr 2008 16:49:49 -0700

the store brands are always way better than kraft, and waaay cheaper. lol. so why pay triple the price right??? silly people

~*Tracy & Crystalyn*~

I agree!!

want2bmoms — Sun, 13 Apr 2008 15:18:17 -0700

I don't think it is the lesbian issue. What got me is that the CASA people are the ones with the issue, not Social Services. I think that part of the issue is that they don't want to have to think (literally, they assured us that CASA training would be accessible and that they would make sure there were no problems... then held 7/12 of the training upstairs in a building with no elevator/lift...) they don't want to have to work with my DP's physical difficulties because it might change the way they have to do something (in fact, we had to go get a ramp and provide it for the duration of the training, so that they wouldn't have to move their training to the -available- classroom (downstairs) because then they would have to move the tables - which they had to set up every week before class anyways...).

the point at which the lesbian thing came into account is when on the day we went to do our "exit interviews" and mell told M, the girl doing her interview (who was very concerned aboutme having to take care of my own family when Mell needed to CASA), that she was my own family, we were partners, and that wouldn't be an issue. M said that she suspected that and it was ok... Of course two days later we got a call from the (very conservative) director of the program saying that "she knows we have other things we need to do that night and, well, why don't we just skip the swearing in ceremony and not have to worry about it?" (you should know that in order to take a case you HAVE to be sworn in by the judge).

See, these guys aren't really part of the "the system" they are a group of volenteers from a nationally based volunteer program... Who we haven't heard from since swearing in.

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I do COMPLETELY agree with you about the system not caring, our caseworker/trainer is great and training for foster care kinda rocks my socks. We are super excited to get "our" caseworker (I am hoping that we just get to keep C, who has a caseload and is a trainer, she's just so easy to talk to) and have our homestudy done. (We are in CO, btw. & no dom partnerships) She's really excited that we didn't have picture perfect lives growing up (even thought neither of us were in foster care -although I will be the first to say that I should have been, in fact, all three of us at home should have been) and that we have seen where these kids might be coming from... She was also very fast to assure us the neither DP's disability, nor the fact that we were in a relationship was going to be a problem, then told us that "they have six other same sex couple who are fostering, at least one of which has also adopted, and "numerous" fp's who have both physical and mental disabilities and as long as they are being handled and not affecting hte children's care, it is a non issue!"

So, as a foster momma, 1) what do you have the kids call you? and 2) give us all your best advice on getting started! (we are taking birth - 36 months - either gender)

As a foster Parent

Tue, 08 Apr 2008 10:32:42 -0700

I am a lesbian and a foster parent. I was also a foster child when I was a kid. So I know more about the system than anyone person should. It soulds to me that because you have a disbled partner that they don't want to put any more on you than you already have. They want to make sure that the children that are placed are taken care of and are not put in to a situation where they are unintentionally neg. I don't know what state you are in, but if you and your partner are registared domestic partners, than I am guessing that it is not because you are Leasbian. My partner and I have actually become the experts on gay and Lesbian childern some how in our area. The system really doesn't care what you do in your bedroom they just care if the children are going to get the best possible care.

re:

mommyzrus917 — Sun, 06 Apr 2008 22:35:31 -0700

I am really glad that everything in this particular case turned out well. But it really is a scary thing being lesbian parents that we could face the possibility of our child being taken out of our care for simply being gay. I really hope the world will change alot more quickly than it has been for our childrens sake.
~*Tracy & Crystalyn*~

.

want2bmoms — Fri, 04 Apr 2008 22:27:13 -0700

wow just reading your

Thu, 03 Apr 2008 22:01:08 -0700

wow just reading your comment i think someone would be scared to give you foster kids....

we made all the classes,

want2bmoms — Sun, 30 Mar 2008 03:16:21 -0700

we made all the classes, after talking to the trainer for Foster Care - who basically told then they were being rediculous, 60+% of couple drop out of fostering because it's too much work, and her director doesn't haave a problem as long as we aren't CASA's to our foster kids or their sibling - , they "let" us graduate (but they are gong to wait until we "decide" to let us take a case. ie, no cases until we have dropped out of foster care or decided to not take any kids in)
No, we aren't wealthy are anything like that, my DP is in a wheelchair and needs a full time live in aide, which is me, the state chooses to pay me to do this because if they didn't, I would have to work out of the home and they would have to pay either for 24/7 nursing care, or for her to live in a facility. (which wouuld make everyone miserable, because the only thing wrong with her is that her legs are well, ...incooperative... and she is oppinionated and stubborn and alert and strong and educated...). But I don't consider it a "job", I have been raised that family takes care of family...

I am a bit confused here.

Mon, 24 Mar 2008 10:37:55 -0700

I am a bit confused here. Do you mean you have not been able to make all the classes? Neither of you are working? Are you financially independant?

Congratulations!

Todduscraig — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 07:08:07 -0800

Hey there from Colorado too... Being a foster parent requires a truly remarkable person, but going it alone makes you all the more remarkable. But isn't having a toddler around worth it??? We have an adopted 16 month old who consistently wears out two daddies, so I have no idea how I'd ever do it as one. You have my admiration!

congrats!

njs0616 — Tue, 04 Mar 2008 15:52:56 -0800

I'm happy to read this blog of yours. I also read your profile info and i'm also happy to hear you are single by choice!! I'm 5 months pregnant and I am also single by choice. And I COMPLETELY agree that it is a scary thought being a single parent, but in some cases I think it can be way more beneficial for the child/ren. Good luck with "the kid" :)

Nicki

Foster Care

Wed, 13 Feb 2008 08:33:53 -0800

NEWS ADVISORY
NCD #08–553
February 13, 2008
Contact: Mark S. Quigley
202-272-2004

National Council on Disability to Make Recommendations on Youth with Disabilities in the Foster Care System

WASHINGTON—The National Council on Disability (NCD) will release its latest report titled, Youth with Disabilities in the Foster Care System: Barriers to Success and Proposed Policy Solutions, at a news conference at 1:00 p.m. February 26, 2008, at the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 200 Independence Avenue, SW, Room 505A, Washington, DC. This event is open to the public and the media and free of charge.

The goal for our country’s youth is to live healthy, happy lives and to become self-sufficient, contributing members of society as adults. However, there are subsets of youth who cannot reach these goals with ease. These youth need additional supports to assist them in their journey toward a healthy adulthood, as they are more vulnerable than the “average” youth and thus are more apt to fall through the cracks during their journey. Youth development researchers have determined that some specific youth populations are more vulnerable than others. This report examines one exceptionally challenged group in particular: older youth (specifically, preteen through young adult) with disabilities who are in the foster care system.

NCD is an independent federal agency and is composed of 15 members appointed by the President, by and with the advice and consent of the Senate. We provide advice to the President, Congress, and executive branch agencies to promote policies, programs, practices, and procedures that—
(A) guarantee equal opportunity for all individuals with disabilities, regardless of the nature or severity of the disability; and
(B) empower individuals with disabilities to achieve economic self-sufficiency, independent living, and inclusion and integration into all aspects of society.

For more information, please contact NCD’s director of external affairs, Mark S. Quigley, at mquigley@ncd.gov or by telephone at 202-272-2004.

# # #

Couple's adopting

Tue, 05 Feb 2008 09:58:52 -0800

I agree that a married couple may be more stable for a child then a couple who have not decided to make that commitment because if they decided not to be together it might create an un-stable environment for the child. Yet, there are couples who have been together for years and have a very stable relationship and would be perfect for parent hood. Also, I am a Lesbian and I believe that if they pass this measure then the state should allow gay and lesbian couples to marry because they are discriminating against that group of people. There are a huge amount of gay and lesbian couples out there that would love to be joined in wedlock and would make better parents then some straight couples. Being gay and lesbian is not a disease, you can't catch it. There was a time in our history where white people beleived that when they shook the hand of an African American that it was necessary to rub your hand off afterwards as if you can catch black, which is ridiculous, well preventing children from having a loving family and caring, responsible parents, and a good stable life just because your religion says it is wrong for two people of the same sex to sleep together is just as ridiculous and it is almost cruel. Open up your eyes, there are more important things in this world to put your energy and means in to then just focusing on preventing loving human beings, who would make amazing parents, the right to adopt. WAKE UP!

stupid backwardness

Sun, 09 Dec 2007 21:26:22 -0800

I find it rediculous that they ban them from adopting!