PROSPECTIVE ADOPTIVE PARENTS SUPPORT GROUP

Good morning. Last night i went to my 2nd bridges to parenting support group here in san diego. They just started this group, and it happens on the second monday of each month. The moderators were VERY sympathetic, and nice. What i gleamed from last night was for me VERY insightful as to how your picked to adopt a particular child. when your home study is approved here in san diego county adoptions,all your info from your “what will i accept paper, and all the info from your home study is entered into the computer. then its checked to see if there are any matches. if at anytime a child comes into the system, and your specs,matches the childs or very closely your file is pulled. along with as many as 10 to 20 others. a committee meets on wednesdays to discuss kids and posible matches. then the top 5-10 are sent to the childs worker. Becuase that worker really knows this child, and can kind of pick out out the best match. And then again from what i gleamed from the meeting, you are called to be informed about said child, and you decide wether or not you would like a “Telling’ to hear more. Now folks i could be wrong about this process, but thats kind of what i Gleamed from this group as to how it works. I think we sometimes think , “did they lose my file”? “do they just not want to place a child with a gay single parent”? I am waiting for my home study approval as we speak. my worker said i would be approved and it could be friday or after. Shes super nice and supportive so i know she does home studies all the time and if there was an issue she would have brought it to my attention. Sooooo i wait. I excited, scared and all the other feelings there are. At the support group last night there was one very nice lady who had been waiting for well over a year. I also heard of people adopting very quickly after home study approval. MY feeling is its how honest you were, how open you were with the” What will i accept paper”, and if you match a child in regards to specifics. I notice that a lot of folks who have waited a long time feel like what is wrong with me????, but i do believe if you asked for a newborn blond haird baby girl with no exposure to drugs or alchol, no family medical issues ect…. here in san diego..ya might be waiting…for a while. Because lets face it its not reality. Could it happen? yep, but i dont care if my son is 1 or 5, latino,or caucasian,or arabic. If his mom smoked pot, or has a grandparent whose bi-polar. Im open to it and when they share with you “The telling” you can make an informed decision. You will know in your gut if its right. Ok im off my soap box. Im off to work have a great day everyone. Hope evryone finds the child that was meant for them, take care, rick

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